I don’t have much to give or much to say at all
But I still hope you have good days
Always trying to be okay with this
But I wish your nights are long without me
I still feel tired and empty, this is what you left me with
Trying still to find the comfort in between all this misery
Can’t seem to fall asleep without dreaming of you
Can’t seem to go on without thinking of you
It all comes down to me being nothing without you.
Waiting on death in brightly lit fields
I found god once in an empty bottle, sadly the bottle shattered
Waiting on life to take me away
Bright lights break me away
Sleepless
Spent my days without you
Just to spend my nights thinking
Of the one who stole my heart
The one who tore me apart
I spend my nights thinking
I spend my days sunken
I spend my nights sleepless
I spend my life broken.
Time deserts me when it’s through
Growing older without you
Abandoning me and this too?
Sounds of sirens greet me
As you have left me with this bitter feeling.
I can’t take these thoughts anymore
Everything is failing around me
Even myself
Dying never seemed perfect
Leaving was always worth it
But I can’t keep running
I can’t turn my back on this
Here it is just weighing me down
All of it is weighing down
Twenty-two years in and I’m still struggling
To find worth in this place
Time seems to be playing catch up
I don’t know if I’ll ever be caught up
All I needed was someone to say, “Stay with me”
All I needed was you to say, “Stay with me”
All I ever needed to say, “Don’t leave me”
I lack it all
The touch
The thought
The love
A beat
I lack it all, don’t you see?
Oh waning death take me now
I seek an adventure into the unknown
A perilous darkness seems worth it all
For one last thrill
Death, the ultimate journey.
Take my heart do with it as you may
Just know my love isn’t yours to keep
It belongs a girl who loves me no more
So let misery take me for a whirl
A joyous sensation it may be, oh for you
Sweet misery
This cold chill grips my throat to the point where I can’t breathe
Scattered breaths, grasping for air but no help to save this damned soul
In the moments I have left I think of past loves and memories
Hoping maybe I can be saved but there was never hope for me
No gods, no masters, no man left to answer to
Time to accept it for what it is, death never seemed so glamorous
I miss the girl who calmed my nerves and said it would all be alright
I miss the one who loved me no matter wrong or right
I just miss the woman of my dreams that took my heart away
I miss her more with each day past and hope for it again one day.
We wish for the ones we’ve lost and hope things will change
I wished for a love that would always stay the same
I’ve found it but I forgot to wish for the one that would stay.
Most days seem better if I disappeared
To fade from this place and never reappear
To be missed by few and forgotten by the rest
I am just, just not the same
I don’t blame you, I blame myself
Living is hard after you lose more than you should isn’t it?
I know it is but time was cherished and you have memories
I have memories but I want more
That chance is lost on me though when my existence isn’t acknowledged
Always trying to speak but the words never sounded right
Leaving notes engraved in stone just hoping you would see them
These are just ramblings of a lost man, no one of purpose
Just wandering until I find something worth the torment.
Spent 8 months trying to get better
To only realize that it’s you on my mind
Spent this time trying to be okay
But forgetting you won’t dull the pain
Funny, I am sure you don’t love me anymore
Or at the very least you have forgotten me
If I just got up and left you wouldn’t notice
Loving someone may never seem worth it, yet I gave you my all
And that is what ultimately destroyed me
I love you still but maybe one day I will forget as well.
I gave my heart away just to have it crumble
Was told it could be fixed by a girl with subtle lips
She took it in hand and piece by piece
Fixed the heart that had no beat
I gave it to her and asked one thing
Protect it from harm and keep it safe
An agreement was arranged and love formed from it
But time wasn’t on our side as it seems
We both fell apart…..never to be seen again.
